Testing Testing 1-2-3
Last week I invigilated a test that was written by my 2ndyear business students. Oh but before I continue, I just remembered, when the spell-check went mad on the spelling of the word “invigilate,” my wonderful mother (whom I have dragged into the 21stcentury kicking and screaming) saw one of my status updates on Facebook using this word and kindly sent me an email to correct my spelling! So I can guarantee that “invigilated” is spelled correctly (I’m sure you were wondering). Anyhoo, as I mentioned, I watched paint dryinvigilated last week.
What I find particularly amusing, is the student brain when a test is approaching, they literally go into a holding pattern. Then, after they have made their stress known to anyone who will listen, they then go into test-mode. Test-mode includes:
· Donning “I’m gonna smash this test” outfits
· Sporting comfy shoes for the long sit
· Bringing pens and kokis of all colors to pretty-up the test paper (girls)
· Bringing 1 old pen (boys)
· Sucking the vending machine dry of dehydration and starvation deterrents
· The start of nervous bladder affliction
· Arranging good luck charms
Now seeing as I had plenty of time on my hands during this process and I was trying desperately to stay awake, I was able to scrutinize the participants and came up with a group of finalists, whom I painstakingly narrowed down to the prize winners in the various categories. The prize for my favorite outfit, went to the girl who sat right in the front wearing a short black mini-skirt and long grey Wellington boots, with white skulls all over them. The skulls all sported different features (because obviously if they were all the same, that would look ridiculous).
The prize for my favorite comfortable shoes (and it was a close call with the skull wellies nearly winning a double-whammy, because they looked mega-comfy and this can surely be the only reason she wears them) went to the girl wearing….. wait for it….. slippers. Yes it is apparently important to wear comfortable shoes when you have to sit for 90 minutes straight. Now I am not a gambling girl but I would bet all of my hard-earned money on the fact that she had inherited said slippers from her Grandmother who had worn them until her bunions ultimately achieved their goal and broke free through the threadbare material on the one side.
At this stage I would like to point out that the test is written during the weekly lecture time-slot so as not to disrupt other lectures that the student is required to attend. The lecture is normally 2 hours, the test is only 1½, but it’s different because IT’S A TEST!!
At least coming up with my 2 fashion winners had taken a bit of mind-numbing time, but there was another distraction from waiting to change the “time remaining” on the whiteboard and it came in the form of: – student questions during the exam. My 2 favorites:
1. Usually the instructions intimidate the students so I wasn’t too surprised when a hand shot. Excited that the monotony was broken, I rushed over to the young lady who had called me over to ask “is this what you mean when you say leave a line between each answer?” Um I’m not sure what else that can mean but okay I’ll fall for it. “Yes, that is correct.”
2. Then I got “Do we have a lecture after this?” Seriously?? Let’s work this out together shall we? The lecture slot is 2 hours, the test is 1½ hours and it took 10 minutes to settle everyone and to hand out the papers before they actually started writing. This left us with 20 minutes for a lecture. Then there is the usual 15 minute tea break in the lecture which brings us to a whole 5 minutes remaining, during which I would need to collect the final test scripts, so no sweetie it seems pretty unlikely to me, based purely on the time allocation, that we would be having a lecture after this! But instead I took a deep breath and replied kindly:
“No, there is no lecture after this.”
Off I went to change the “time remaining” on the whiteboard, being very careful not to bash my head against it in frustration (it smudges, I’ve learned from previous head banging in class) because, another hand was in the air, waiting with another mind-blowing question for me to wrap my mind around – ooh I wondered what this one could be……. ah yes, bladder issues! *sigh* how sad that again, due to the boredom, I found this at least entertaining.
